Wedding planning + party planning recovery kit

The homemade gift folks actually want

Nov 27, 2023

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Years ago, about 15 years to be exact, I was briefly married (it ended amicably and we’re still friends). Which meant that 15 years ago I was planning a wedding, with all the logistics, stress, headaches, and expense that entails.
Weddings are super fun, but they’re a lot of work!
And while I loved the many thoughtful gifts I got from friends and family (many of which I still have and use) another gift I would have loved was something to help me wind down after the hectic months of windup leading up to the big day.

About ten years later, I started reflecting on what I actually considered to be the most meaningful gift I could give, and decided it would be something that helps folks ease back into daily life and to just have some enjoyable, chill downtime.
We don’t often give ourselves permission to relax after a big life change, and giving a gift that supports relaxation, in a cute package, can help with just that.

I call them Wedding Planning Recovery Kits, and for whatever reason, though I love that it happened, started packaging them up to look sort of like emergency kits. The name and sentiment feel accurate though: We love the party and gathering together, but the planning? That's the part we have to recover from.

Yes, people have honeymoons to help with this, but what about something for people who don't take one right away (or at all)? Or, who maybe just want some relaxing time together as they transition into life as married people?

I think I landed on the name because I wanted to provide support for rest, which is something we are Not Good at doing, while also offering gifts that would be largely consumed and used rather than risking buying something that would just collect dust on a shelf.

I’m often asked what I put in them, which depends a lot on who’s being gifted, but here’s a basic template:

Brown kraft paper gift bag:

I decorate it like the photo above. If I’m mailing the gift I might put a piece of Bristol paper or other sturdy art paper on top of the gift in the shipping box with the same decoration (there’s a photo of that below).

Contents:
Nice relaxing things that also fit with the lifestyle of the people you’re gifting (for example if they don’t have a bath tub, don’t send them bath salts, maybe a nice scented candle instead). I usually do some combo of body care stuff and good smelling stuff, lotions, candles, bath soaks, things like that.

Snacks and drinks: usually a bottle of wine and some decadent dessert or candy, but I’ll also do these with CBD sodas or other non-alcoholic options if needed (and savory snacks if they don’t like sweet, obviously nothing that counters any allergies or restrictions).

Other nice stuff: flaxseed-filled eye masks, a playlist of relaxing music or meditations, herbal steams and teas.

Something homemade: jam, a spice blend (most recently: spruce tip powder), pickles, etc. Something from a local producer, like Beautiful Briny Sea’s ladybug picnic, a personal favorite, is a great stand-in here.

Basically the goal is to give a gift that has components to relax the body, to get some nice snack treats in when chilling out at home, and calm the mind.

I give these at the wedding or mail them right after, and always pick shelf stable goodies so they’ll hold up if the gift isn’t opened until after the honeymoon (or whenever).

Recovery kits aren't just for weddings

While I primarily make these for friends' weddings, I've made similar versions for other big life events too: moving to a new city, buying and fixing up a house, launching a new business, publishing a new book, signing long-awaited divorce papers (provided the person feels celebratory about that!), starting a new career, etc. You get the idea.

Planning other big to-dos (family reunion, huge holiday gathering, etc.) might also warrant a recovery kit: An idea that may come in handy for you during this impending gift giving season.

I especially like gifting and celebrating for moments in life that might be just as pivotal but that we, as a society, don't tend to value quite so highly. I've long felt that single folks and/or folks without kids tend to get shortchanged on life change-related celebrations, and offering a goodie bag full of things to celebrate and help relax is great for whatever life change you're celebrating (housewarming? milestone birthday? new job? new book? Or if you're like me, a notbaby shower!) Our lives, and the way we celebrate, are entirely what we make them after all.

I hope this gives you some unique, gifting ideas, and sparks inspiration for the folks who have asked me about these over the years!

What would you put in your recovery kit (for whatever positive + big life change)?

Wedding planning + party planning recovery kit

The homemade gift folks actually want

I’m often asked what I put in them, which depends a lot on who’s being gifted, but here’s a basic template:

Recovery kits aren't just for weddings

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